Note - I realize my posts about my various post menopause issues can amount to TMI, especially for men. I write about them as a PSA for other women. Particularly younger women who might later remember this advice if they start to have similar issues.
Intercourse has been really uncomfortable for me for quite a while. HWD has been a peach about it, but I still wanted to address the situation. I tried a non-prescription cream that contained estriol (a very weak form of estrogen) - it didn't do anything for me and actually seemed to make my vulva feel more irritated. On the use it or lose it theory, I tried "training" the area by using a vibrator, but I didn't make much progress with that either. So finally a few months ago I decided to try to find a gynecologist specializing in menopause issues.
Based on advice from an online menopause group, I found the directory of providers who are NAMS-certified (North American Menopause Society). NAMS certified practitioners have taken additional training to learn about treating the array of possible menopause systems. Then I cross checked local certified providers against my HMO and found a few that were certified, then I looked at the bios and online reviews for that subset and picked one. Unfortunately she was scheduled out for a few months... but yesterday the appointment finally happened.
TLDR - find the website for the North American Menopause Society and look for providers in your area.
We chatted and she did an exam and I learned that I have not one, but two different issues.
One - Post-menopausal urogenital syndrome. Which is more casually known as vaginal atrophy, but I hate that term so let's just say VA. Anyway, here's a short copypasta from Mayo:
VA (atrophic vaginitis) is thinning, drying and inflammation of the vaginal walls that may occur when your body has less estrogen. VA occurs most often after menopause.
For many women,VA not only makes intercourse painful but also leads to distressing urinary symptoms. Because the condition causes both vaginal and urinary symptoms, doctors use the term "genitourinary syndrome of menopause (GSM)" to describe VA and its accompanying symptoms.
For what it's worth, I've also been super prone to urinary tract infections, and tend to get up at least a couple of times a night to pee. Fun times!
VA was what I had assumed was going on, and I was hoping to get a prescription for vaginal estrogen, which she did indeed give me. I have never done full hormone supplementation because of having a long ago history with blood clots in my legs. And at this point, even if the provider could bring herself to overlook that, I'm too old to start it. But topical estrogen in the vagina doesn't carry the same risks as taking oral estrogen.
Issue two was that she saw signs of lichen sclerosis on my vulva. I had heard about this condition in the online menopause group but didn't think I had it. I think if I do, it's in the fairly early stages. The doctor took a biopsy (ouch!) to confirm what she thought she was seeing.
Back to Mayo:
Lichen sclerosus (LIE-kun skluh-ROW-sus) is a condition that causes patchy, discolored, thin skin. It usually affects the genital and anal areas.
Anyone can get lichen sclerosus but postmenopausal women are at higher risk. It isn't contagious and can't be spread through sexual contact.
The treatment will be a steroid ointment, which apparently I need to do forever since it will come back if I stop. Lichen sclerosis puts me at increased risk for vulvar cancer, so it's in my interest to keep treating it even if I suddenly decide I don't care how my vulva looks, ha.
So, it's somewhat discouraging but I'm really, really, glad that I decided to see someone. If you can believe it...two or three years ago after I had a pap smear and STI testing, I then got a letter from my HMO saying that I wouldn't need to do pap smears or pelvic exams any more since I would be turning 65. In googling just now, I saw that many organizations are now calling for those guidelines to be revisited, which is good.
TLDR #2 - You don't have to stop having gynecologist visits just because you're over 65. There are good reasons to have your hooha checked out.
It was a good day working at the polls on Tuesday (followed by a sinking feeling evening very similar to what I remember in 2016). We had a little under 900 voters. Interestingly, I had a FB post come up from 2018 where I mentioned we had 1,200 that year. That was my first year as an election judge and not a presidential election. I think early voting has had a big impact. Our precinct had about 500 early voters this year, so the overall turnout was still a bit higher than 2018. I heard an interview with MN's secretary of state where he said overall turnout for the state was 76% and we'd possibly again be highest in the nation; if not, certainly in the top few states. He said his goal was "high turnout, low drama" and we got that. No bomb threats or harassment, only a couple minor equipment malfunctions.
Our precinct ran very smoothly. Our numbers were in balance all day (we do a cross check once an hour comparing the number of voter check-ins to the number of ballot receipts to the total voted number on the ballot scanner). We were able to do the poll shut down (taking down voting booths, putting away equipment, boxing up and securing the ballots, doing paperwork) in 35 minutes, which was great.
So even though I'm disappointed in the overall result, I'm proud to have been a small part of running a fair election.
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26 comments
I've heard that a lot of menopausal women go through thinning and dryness. It's great that you found a doctor who can help you with your symptoms.
Now, let's hope that the US won't fall into a dictatorship.
Indeed!
That's interesting that you were told lichen sclerosis will come back. I had it in the early 2000s and was given a rx ointment and it's never come back. Maybe getting it during menopause makes it different? (and if anything, we need to talk MORE about gyn issues here, who CARES if it's tmi for sensitive little mensy wensys)
(the laugh was at "mensy wensys"
).
Hm, interesting - that's awesome that it went away for good for you. This will be a good question for my followup appointment in eight weeks.
The ointment is very cheap so it's not like it's a major deal to slap it on twice a week for the rest of my life I guess!
Just in case the NAMS doc didn't mention it ... vaginal estrogen cream works best if it's massaged into the vaginal walls (like rubbing in hand lotion) You could make it fun by having HWD help 😁
Interesting! I decided to give the tablets a try. I did try Premarin cream about 12 years ago and never liked the way it would be seeping out of me the whole next day.
But I've also seen a few people mention that they find the cream to be more effective than the tablets, so I'm open to making a switch if need be.
Thanks BJ. I did not know about rubbing it in
I had my annual well woman visit this morning and my dr has ordered some bloodwork given I'm right at the average age for menopause (I have an iud for a couple more years so I don't have periods to know if I am fully there yet or not - as of 3 years ago I was still ovulating per the ultrasound before insertion). We talked about HRT as she is super passionate about all of the health reasons to do it. Bloodwork is Monday morning and then I have to go back and see her later this month. She has a 6 month wait for appts normally, but I have been in her practice for nearly 30 years so she is squeezing me in for my followup. She is 61 and looks closer to 41 so she must have figured something out (though my dad said she looked about 12 when she delivered my daughter 20 years ago- ha! ). We will see what comes of it all.
I'm glad your doctor is up to date! Unfortunately when I went through menopause everyone was still reeling from that study that showed HRT to be bad (which we now know was flawed).
There are a lot of great reasons to take it.
Good the hoo ha updated
Thank you for working the polls! I always admire the folks that participate in democracy. I truly truly truly hope that will occur in 4 years, actually in two.
Good on you for being persistent with your hooha health. Gotta keep that kitty purring.
It's almost unimaginable to me that elections would go away, yikes! We shall see, I guess.
@smartasswoman it seems that nothing is off the table at this point
You are not the only one dissapointed by your election result as the result will in some way affect the rest of the world too. We here experienced several years of nasty division when Boris Johnson was elected and with the hatred that is spread by a cetain social media platform has resulted in myself and some friends losing long standing friendships, I hope that people will come to their senses one day.
I read something this morning that helped. It was a reminder that not everyone is a political junkie like myself, constantly poring over the news and reading about the latest egregious thing T. did. No doubt a lot of the people who voted for him are just feeling financially strapped, think that he's going to fix things, and haven't really paid attention to all of the other stuff.
I have to think that or I'd be in the weird position of hating half the people in my country.
Being a bit of an oldie myself I have known women that have suffered from a lack of Estrogen, one woman was given pessaries that she had to insert about half an hour be sex and the other had to use them about three times a week. A good water based lube seemed to help as well and I would say the whole process is less of a passion killer than fumbling about using a condom.
Oh yes, I've been a dedicated lube user for ages. I waited too long to look into what extra measures I needed to be taking.
The one thing about learning new things is you never know when those bits of info might be useful in your own life. I suppose I could say part of my reason for being here has to do with menopause and the issues like painful sex that can ensue. And sometimes there is not the desire to work on finding a "cure" like you seem to be doing. Your mate is a lucky person to have you working so hard on it. We are lucky to live in a place where voting drama is rare and we have enough voting places that keep us from waiting hours to vote. And MN rocks when it comes to voter turn-out....I believe it was 76% this time around. I liked that they had 8 tables to vote at besides the usual voting booths. Otherwise there would have been a wait. Can you imagine what it would be like if everyone decided it was important to vote?There are literally millions who never take the initiative. I don't get it. Again thank you for working the polls. I went to another meeting last night....but I will share that on your other posting place.
I suppose part of the reason I'm trying hard to fix it is that it's a relatively new relationship. Being completely honest, I have no idea if I would have the same attitude if it was a 30 year relationship where we had had the chance to have plenty of PIV sex earlier on.
@smartasswoman That says a lot about who you are as a partner.
@redswallow777 well...I had a prior relationship of 14 years that went down the tubes and a big part of the reason was that we let the fire go out, sexually. So that's why it's hard to say how I'd react to this situation in a longer relationship. After that earlier one ended, I did resolve not to let it happen again...thus the current efforts...
I swear by the Bonafide hyaleuronic inserts. 3 a week and hormone cream twice a week. My gyno says it is ok to use. Helps me a lot. Can be pricey but I don’t care when it comes to my comfort.
I've heard good things about hyaluronic acid. I tried a less expensive version than the Bonafide and it didn't seem to do much for me. If the estrogen doesn't completely do the trick I'll probably look into the ones you're using.
You gals have a "Society" specializing in that body part? Wow...👍
Men have something similar. We go there to discuss our symptoms and have detailed examinations done, but we call our specialists — mechanics.
Men are reticent to come forward about their issues, preferring to wait until something falls off before we show up for treatment. Which also explains why women live longer than men. Sad... but true.
Good job about doing your part. I've partially recovered. 😐
OK, I'm going to be a little pedantic here, please forgive me. Menopause doesn't effect just one body part (even though I only discussed the one in this post). There are hot flashes that happen all over your body, joint pain, brain fog, sleep issues, mood changes, weight gain...
So no....it's not a society focusing on just one body part. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.
Yes....good for you for doing your part. Glad u were feeling well enuff to do so. There we 17 mil...that didnt vote in this election that did in 2020. Very disappointing to say the least. Good hoo ha info too...lol ~
I woke up HWD at 4:45 in the morning to put a lidocaine patch on my back (one of the nonprescription ones he had purchased for me, that didn't work so well a week ago). Things have improved enough that this time it did work - I didn't start feeling any back discomfort until 5 pm. Woohoo! Definitely bringing some of those along on the road trip at the end of the month.
And yes...I am quite disappointed. News media is talking about how this could be a major realignment in the voting electorate.
I will be watching gas and egg prices closely, as they are sure to start coming down now! LOL.
@smartasswoman ....ya prices will go down along with any semblance of ethics , morals n humanity...ugh @ it all. Sooooo glad ur coming along so well....the patches actually give relief ! Yayyyyy
@jajo696 I was being sarcastic about the prices lol.
I think your postings on this subject are invaluable.
Thanks spunky, I appreciate it!
Fun graphic!
Mrs. C was diagnosed with VA, tried the cream without good success, then just quit having sex AT ALL.
On a more fun note, a former blogger that I went to see, thought she had a UTI after my visit, since she was prone to them anyway. NOPE! Diagnosis was inflammation of the vaginal walls, or as I like to put it, I wore out her pussy. 🤣
That's a shame that the cream didn't help her. I understand the discouragement and just wanting to give up, but I've been trying to resist those feelings as it isn't really fair to HWD.
I've got my fingers crossed that eventually this will bring the fun back for me. 🤞
Whoop Smart! Thank you for your service and for the information.
Thanks for reading, Lee.