Following my FANCY A FACIAL? blog post, this is another post, with poll, in a series about various sexual acts.
This post is only about choking as an erotic or sexual practice, sometimes called breath play or erotic asphyxiation, and isn't about choking generally.
I've just finished reading a newspaper article about the sexual practice of choking and was slightly shocked - see Hone J (2024, 1 September) 'I think it's natural': why has sexual choking become so prevalent among young people? The Guardian.
Erotic asphyxiation hit the news following the 1997 death of Michael Hutchence, the singer of INXS. There was also Tim Winton's 2008 novel, Breath. But the practice has a long history in BDSM circles. It can be traced back to at least the 1700s. And, unsurprisingly, the practice appears in Marquis de Sade's 1791 novel, Justine, or the Misfortunes of Virtue.
In a very recent study of 4,702 people aged between 18 and 35, researchers from the University of Melbourne and University of Queensland found that well over a half had been strangled during sex and that just over a half had strangled a partner at least once - See Sharman L S et al (2024) Prevalence of sexual strangulation/choking among Australian 18-35 year olds Archives of Sexual Behavior.
The Australian researchers also found that porn (35 per cent) followed by conversations with friends (12 per cent) and discussions with sexual partners (9 per cent) were the main ways in which young people were introduced to choking as a sexual practice. Furthermore, nearly two-thirds of the young people studied had seen choking scenes in porn and one-third had seen choking depicted in social media.
Despite the risks involved in choking, the researchers claimed that choking is now a mainstream sexual practice amongst young people or at least young people in Australia.
Have you ever choked someone as part of sex? And did you like it?
Have you ever been choked by someone as part of sex? And did you like it?
If your partner wanted be choked and/or wanted to choke you as part of sex, would you go along with things?
I've never choked a sexual partner and I've never been choked by a sexual partner. I wouldn't even agree to choke someone or be choked by someone if my partner wanted it to happen. And I certainly wouldn't engage in autoerotic asphyxiation (self-choking) if my partner wanted me to try it - that has all the makings of a murder scene with me being the 'murderer'! Choking, whether being the choker or the choked, just doesn't appeal to me.
There does seem to be an Australian theme to the sexual practice of choking. Michael Hutchence was an Australian rock singer, Tim Winton is an Australian writer, and the research presented here was conducted by Australian researchers and conducted on Australian young people. Perhaps Australians are chokers! I can't believe us plucky and war-like Brits are chokers! I can't speak for Americans, Canadians, Asians, Africans or other Europeans.
Below is a poll where you can anonymously indicate your experiences of choking as a sexual/erotic practice. Multiple selections are allowed for the poll.
Below, as the first comment, is a summary of the results of a poll contained in my FANCY A FACIAL? blog post.
15
40 comments
My medical brain vs my sexual brain. Never. Numerous episodes of reduced blood flow to the brain may result in small strokes or a major stroke and eventually dementia. And I equate it to abuse, violence and nothing erotic. But, that’s just me.
There are lots of risks with choking as a sexual practice which is why I was slightly surprised that it's gone mainstream amongst young people even if just in Australia.
I don't like choking either direction. I've had it done to me, but only by someone I deeply trusted and it actually worried him that he'd take it too far so we only did it the one time. Both of us will sometimes hold our breath as approaching orgasm but worst that could happen would be passing out and resuming breathing. I have had men that held me tight at the neck or high on my torso as a restriction of my movement type domination but without closing off my airway and it was kinda hot. Again - the level of trust with the partner (as in any bdsm play) was critical. I always felt safe.
You're reinforcing the view that choking or breath play requires total trust.
Hard No....on all the above. I grew up with corporal punishment...nothing restrictive or painful could ever be associated with pleasure for me~
I received corporal punishment at school though I still enjoy a spank, nothing heavy though!
A little fun tight grip on the neck and light chocking is a real turn on to me, asphyxiation to the point of passing out may be a bit much.
I guess trust is key in breath play.
Thanks for stopping by to comment.
Have you ever choked someone as part of sex? And did you like it?
Have you ever been choked by someone as part of sex? And did you like it?
If your partner wanted be choked and/or wanted to choke you as part of sex, would you go along with things?
No, nope, no, no, no, no, no, no ...... I like living
I'm a 'no' person who likes living too!
No thanks. See every one else's comments who say no
It seems nearly everyone is saying no. It's clear we're not young!
@spunkycumfun or foolish
@bignicktx There is that.
@spunkycumfun scenario, in bed girl asks me to choke then says harder leave handprints next day visited by police asking why tryed to choke her to death they arrest as it is part of her shakedown to extort money
@bignicktx At least a lesson was learnt!
@spunkycumfun fortunately not reality just possible if not probable scenario
@bignicktx I'm pleased it wasn't a reality.
@spunkycumfun yet the scenario is in my head obviously due to interactions with Crazy B who have done highly negative things to me. Also why avoid Mos anything resembling B and D
@bignicktx I can understand your thinking.
Never done and will never do. A friend liked it, but i could not bring myself to indulge her. The chances of it going wrong to high, how can the person mention the safe word if they being choked ?
That's a very good point about the safe word.
While I have no interest in choking - in any form - I have to say that as I near orgasm, while masturbating, I find myself holding my breath, though not deliberately. So, perhaps I would enjoy it. However, I have no intention of testing that theory. As Enigma says ... it seems unsafe.
I don't blame not wanting to test that theory.
Nope, No, Nein, not gonna do it!
It's three fat 'Nos' from me too!
@spunkycumfun how explosive must an orgasm be? I have a hard time not exploding into a powder the way it is! 😊
@LadyLisa77 I'm interested to know what powder you may be exploding in!
I answered no to everything. Like OddsAgainst noted, it's a high risk activity. A lot of the bdsm groups in my area don't allow breath play at their parties.
I'll give one caveat, there have been a few times I've enjoyed what I call "symbolic" choking - where your partner puts their hands around your neck but doesn't apply pressure. It's a similar feeling to having my hands held down. And I can think of one occasion where my partner asked me to put my hands on his neck (maybe he was hinting at wanting a choking but I wasn't about to give one).
I like pinning a partner down with my hands while having sex but I'm never tempted to grab their neck.
No thank you
I think there'll be quite a few 'Nos' here!
I do not understand the appeal of choking; neither the giving or getting of it. Never want to do it either.
The appeal of choking passes me by too.
A female I was fucking Started choking me when we was fucking in hot tub...At first I was pissed, but it just maid me beat that pussy up
I'm not sure what I'd do if a woman started choking me during sex.
Thanks for stopping by.
David Carradine is missing from the list. And he had such a career renaissance after the Kill Bill movies, too. Right before their sword fight, when he says "Baby, you ain't kidding,'" to the Uma Thurman character after she says, "You and I have unfinished business," towards the end of the second one, that is such an underappreciated cinematic line because of all the strange tension that's been built up between them. My actual poll response is not on your list of choices. It's yes, I've done that to someone who specifically asked me to do that to her a couple of times, but I didn't like it and I thought it was frankly kind of fucked up for her to ask me to do that. Fortunately, it didn't become part of the regular routine. In women, I wonder if it might actually even be related to BPD or a similar DSM category..... Those stats also seem to suggest a surprisingly lack of familiarity with INXS music in Australia as well, which is even more suprising!
I think what you did was covered in my poll - 'I've choked someone and didn't like it'. There's not enough room in a poll here to cover every scenario.
@spunkycumfun Yes, you're correct. But I must've gotten distracted with that David Carradine bit
@Spacemountainwu David Carradine is quite a distraction!
@spunkycumfun Actually, if you want quite a distraction, see a younger Uma Thurman in Dangerous Liasons
Not much changes over the decades when it comes to what a lot of guys like, LOL.
@Spacemountainwu I remember that great film.
Not choking, no. But a hand on my throat….geez it’s SO FUCKING HOT. The first time I had it to me, we were fucking missionary, and he reached up and put his hand on my throat. I guess my eyes got wide because he immediately removed his hand and apologized. I wasn’t expecting the move and I was honestly shocked for two reasons, the first being that he actually did it, and the second being that I actually liked it. Holy shit, did I like it.
I think maybe for me, it was a peek inside my own awareness… That maybe, just maybe, I like being dominated? I’m a very dominant type-A personality in the real world, my job demands it. In the bedroom, I don’t really worry about who is dominant and who submissive, I don’t get into all of that stuff, but I found when he put his hand on my throat…. My pussy got wetter, and it fucking turned me on immensely.
Thanks for sharing your insight into the world of choking.
The only time I’ve ever gotten pissed off at a guy while he was fucking my wife was when he tried for the third time to choke her after being told no, I’ll just say this, he never fucked her again!
That was one very stupid move on his behalf.
I have been involved with women that requested some forms of choking play. They are comfortable with it and others were wondering about it also they are interested in receiving some forms of light dominance movement play as well.
Some times the husbands are there watching us doing so.
What is important is the ladies trust me as I trust them.
I guess with the husbands watching, nothing can go wrong.
As you say, trust seems vital with this sexual practice.
@spunkycumfun trust is not just for this. It is for every lifestyle style. That what makes a successful play relationship.
@jc_powerman Trust is key in all relationships, whether sexual, social or business relationships.
@spunkycumfun so true, so true .
No and no, i don't se the point.
Choking, so I've been told and so what I've read, is supposed to heighten the sexual pleasure. But, like you, I don't get the point of choking. There are much safer ways to get one's sexual pleasure.
It's bad enough when something goes down the wrong pipe and struggle to breathe without freaking out
That's why I don't snorkel!
This is something that the great actor David Carradine was involved in many years ago. It's not something I would ever consider.
Thanks for sharing this valuable information with us, and I hope your Tuesday is a very tempting one..
I remember the unfortunate death of David Carradine.
Year ago I attended a day long event at a local BDSM studio. It included demonstrations of things like branding, rope bondage, wax play, and yes - choking. Fascinating to watch perhaps, but clearly not for me. (Nor was the branding.)
I wouldn't want to be branded either!
@spunkycumfun THANK GOD it was not branding like they do cattle, with a large heated hunk of metal. It was more like an etching tool, though it did burn, complete with the associated smell. They said the skin heals and the brand is gone is about a year.
@CleavageFan4U I still wouldn't want to be branded that way. Getting a henna tattoo was bad enough!
Many, many years ago, I had my first experience with choking related to sex in an involuntary way. Someone I was having sex with accidentally tightened the rope I had around my neck during a bondage role-play, and I liked it. After that, I've participated in a couple of "simulated hanging" role-plays. And I've only done it with people I absolutely trusted who knew what they were doing, without any risk. Anyway, it's not my cup of tea.
Trust seems key with breath play.
I did have a parter that like me to put my hand on her throat during sex.
I have read that being choked heightens the sexual pleasure.
@spunkycumfun I read the same.
@DanielZwat1950 I'm still not tempted to be choked.
The poll results of my FANCY A FACIAL? blog post weren't too surprising. The poll revealed that about two-thirds of all men who voted have given a sperm facial and nearly all liked giving a facial. Of the third who hadn't given a facial, nearly all wanted to try it or would try it if their partner wanted it. It seems men like giving facials!
My poll curiously found that four women had given their partner a sperm facial. I'm trying to imagine how that can be done! Perhaps those women voting were really men having a fake profile as a woman here.
The poll found that the majority of respondents have received a facial. Twice the number of men had received a facial compared to the number of women.
Over 10 per cent of respondents didn't like receiving a facial. Over half of those who hadn't received a facial wanted one.
Only one-quarter of respondents had been involved in a bukkake party with most enjoying bukkake.
Of the three-quarters who hadn't tried bukkake, most wanted to try it. Far more men have tried and wanted to try bukkake than women.
Though only a few 'trans' people voted, poll results suggest that 'trans' people like facials, including bukkake, more than men and women.
The poll isn't at all representative of either the whole population or even the membership here. The poll is just indicative of those who responded.